Philomath ⋅
Just a 20 year old trying to find myself in the world around me. Avid reader and occasional writer.
There is a rainstorm within me, from which will bloom the most beautiful flowers you've ever seen
Entries 51
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5/1/24 in The Beginning
I didn’t realize my last entry was all the way back in February. The days just seem to collide together into one continuous cycle and I lose track easily of the days. Especially when it comes to ...
2/26/24 - What can I do? in The Beginning
What a disappointment for this to be the first entry I’ve had in almost two months. And for what? To mention the same sort of things I’ve written about time and time again? That when I look back ...
1/2/2024 in The Beginning
Hope that this new year brings new personal growth and adventure. I hope that I am better as a human being then I was last year. I hope to leave all my fears and worries in the past behind, only ...
12/14/2023 in The Beginning
Traveling into the mountains in a few days’ time. Sorting out my stash of books to take with me for pleasure. I haven’t been able to read as much as I would like, due to my studies. So, I’ve been...
November 29, 2023 in The Beginning
Every time I decide to write an entry on here, I feel empty. I want to write on here more but I often feel that I have nothing to say. I feel unsatisfied with my life, which admittedly I always h...
11/8/2023 in The Beginning
Since I was a child, I always wanted to see the world. I never was satisfied with the idea of staying in one location for long periods of time, at least in my hometown. As a young boy, I often dr...
Medieval thought on the universe & structure in The Beginning
Just a quick summary of what I’ve been reading recently. In no way does this cover in detail everything. Instead, just several topics in a short summary for those who might be interested. Just a ...
November 6 in The Beginning
I haven’t been able to login in over a month on my phone. Very frustrating, but alas I am alive. I refuse to believe that it is already the 6th of the month. These last few months have gone by to...
September 25 in The Beginning
I went to the poetry meeting today. Kind of a disappointment but I guess that’s what happens when you set your expectations and then being grounded by reality. Small group (which I expected), the...
September 24 in The Beginning
I think the Fall weather is slowly creeping in. At least what constitutes as “Fall weather” down here in southern America. Of course, it can never replicate those beautiful autumn days in the Nor...
September 21 - Too Sensitive in The Beginning
I’ve always been a very sensitive person, I’ve always tried to impress people, I don’t like confrontation and I feel like a failure when I let someone down. This has been me my entire life. I hat...
II in The Beginning
I just learned that my friend’s grandmother passed away earlier in the day. I gave him my condolences and told him that if he ever needed to talk, I was here. I started to think back about my own...
September 2, 2023 in The Beginning
I come on here, partly because I feel as though it’s my obligation to check in and post. Yet, eveytime I do, I truly having nothing remarkable to say. The days and weeks pass by me in such a daze...
8/18/23 in The Beginning
I walked around campus for around an hour. First to escape the heat and then to escape the rain. I walked around aimlessly at the library trying to find something to read. I picked up a collectio...
07/24/2023 in The Beginning
It’s a rainy day here in the city. The rain always reminds of the Leonard Cohen song, “Famous Blue Raincoat”. It’s been so hot recently that we really needed the rain. If not for the environ...
7/17/23 in The Beginning
Almost 2 in the morning here, Eastern Standard Time. Sitting alone in my own personal haven, with a dim light and music fading in and out between my ears. (Bach sent us heaven through audible fre...
7/4/2023 in The Beginning
The Fourth is a weird holiday for me. I’m grateful for our independence and how relatively safe I am living here. However, I can’t help but think about the destruction and lives destroyed by our ...
06/30/23 in The Beginning
So here I am writing, in the early morning hours. Awake, fully alert, bored, and slightly on edge. Nothing out of the ordinary. I tell myself that writing today is useless, I have nothing of inte...
June 6 2023 in The Beginning
I have a feeling I won’t sleep tonight. I don’t want to sleep tonight, although it’s not like I’ve been doing anything worthwhile in the night to excuse myself of getting proper sleep. Sometimes ...
May 31 2023 - What is Existence? in The Beginning
Life is a strange thing isn’t it? The idea that we, or you, or me exist for a moment and then presumably never again is such a strange thought. It makes me wonder why existence happens at all. Bi...
May 1, 2023 in The Beginning
I have always felt a wave of disappointment wash over me whenever I am unable to do something for someone if they ask me. A neighbor had asked if I were to be able to watch over their dog and I t...
May 1, 2023 in The Beginning
I have always felt a wave of disappointment wash over me whenever I am unable to do something for someone if they ask me. A neighbor had asked if I were to be able to watch over their dog and I t...
4/19/2023 in The Beginning
I haven’t been on here in quite a while. Days go on and they go by so quickly before I even have time to do anything with it. I wish I could stop time and not worry about not doing anything. I’m ...
March 20 in The Beginning
Just came back from a week in England, already missing it. The memories I made there will forever be with me and a part of me will never be the same as I am desperate to relive the feelings those...
Walkin Blues in The Beginning
Sitting down on the bench overlooking the pond listening to some Robert Johnson. Thinking about how fast time passes and how our life is just a small spect on the giant cosmic time-line. Weird to...