Philomath ⋅

Just a 20 year old trying to find myself in the world around me. Avid reader and occasional writer.

There is a rainstorm within me, from which will bloom the most beautiful flowers you've ever seen

Entries 51

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May 02, 2024

5/1/24 in The Beginning

I didn’t realize my last entry was all the way back in February. The days just seem to collide together into one continuous cycle and I lose track easily of the days. Especially when it comes to ...


What a disappointment for this to be the first entry I’ve had in almost two months. And for what? To mention the same sort of things I’ve written about time and time again? That when I look back ...


January 03, 2024

1/2/2024 in The Beginning

Hope that this new year brings new personal growth and adventure. I hope that I am better as a human being then I was last year. I hope to leave all my fears and worries in the past behind, only ...


December 14, 2023

12/14/2023 in The Beginning

Traveling into the mountains in a few days’ time. Sorting out my stash of books to take with me for pleasure. I haven’t been able to read as much as I would like, due to my studies. So, I’ve been...


November 30, 2023

November 29, 2023 in The Beginning

Every time I decide to write an entry on here, I feel empty. I want to write on here more but I often feel that I have nothing to say. I feel unsatisfied with my life, which admittedly I always h...


November 08, 2023

11/8/2023 in The Beginning

Since I was a child, I always wanted to see the world. I never was satisfied with the idea of staying in one location for long periods of time, at least in my hometown. As a young boy, I often dr...


Just a quick summary of what I’ve been reading recently. In no way does this cover in detail everything. Instead, just several topics in a short summary for those who might be interested. Just a ...


November 06, 2023

November 6 in The Beginning

I haven’t been able to login in over a month on my phone. Very frustrating, but alas I am alive. I refuse to believe that it is already the 6th of the month. These last few months have gone by to...


September 26, 2023

September 25 in The Beginning

I went to the poetry meeting today. Kind of a disappointment but I guess that’s what happens when you set your expectations and then being grounded by reality. Small group (which I expected), the...


September 25, 2023

September 24 in The Beginning

I think the Fall weather is slowly creeping in. At least what constitutes as “Fall weather” down here in southern America. Of course, it can never replicate those beautiful autumn days in the Nor...


I’ve always been a very sensitive person, I’ve always tried to impress people, I don’t like confrontation and I feel like a failure when I let someone down. This has been me my entire life. I hat...


September 03, 2023

II in The Beginning

I just learned that my friend’s grandmother passed away earlier in the day. I gave him my condolences and told him that if he ever needed to talk, I was here. I started to think back about my own...


September 03, 2023

September 2, 2023 in The Beginning

I come on here, partly because I feel as though it’s my obligation to check in and post. Yet, eveytime I do, I truly having nothing remarkable to say. The days and weeks pass by me in such a daze...


August 19, 2023

8/18/23 in The Beginning

I walked around campus for around an hour. First to escape the heat and then to escape the rain. I walked around aimlessly at the library trying to find something to read. I picked up a collectio...


July 25, 2023

07/24/2023 in The Beginning

It’s a rainy day here in the city. The rain always reminds of the Leonard Cohen song, “Famous Blue Raincoat”. It’s been so hot recently that we really needed the rain. If not for the environ...


July 17, 2023

7/17/23 in The Beginning

Almost 2 in the morning here, Eastern Standard Time. Sitting alone in my own personal haven, with a dim light and music fading in and out between my ears. (Bach sent us heaven through audible fre...


July 05, 2023

7/4/2023 in The Beginning

The Fourth is a weird holiday for me. I’m grateful for our independence and how relatively safe I am living here. However, I can’t help but think about the destruction and lives destroyed by our ...


June 30, 2023

06/30/23 in The Beginning

So here I am writing, in the early morning hours. Awake, fully alert, bored, and slightly on edge. Nothing out of the ordinary. I tell myself that writing today is useless, I have nothing of inte...


June 07, 2023

June 6 2023 in The Beginning

I have a feeling I won’t sleep tonight. I don’t want to sleep tonight, although it’s not like I’ve been doing anything worthwhile in the night to excuse myself of getting proper sleep. Sometimes ...


Life is a strange thing isn’t it? The idea that we, or you, or me exist for a moment and then presumably never again is such a strange thought. It makes me wonder why existence happens at all. Bi...


May 01, 2023

May 1, 2023 in The Beginning

I have always felt a wave of disappointment wash over me whenever I am unable to do something for someone if they ask me. A neighbor had asked if I were to be able to watch over their dog and I t...


May 01, 2023

May 1, 2023 in The Beginning

I have always felt a wave of disappointment wash over me whenever I am unable to do something for someone if they ask me. A neighbor had asked if I were to be able to watch over their dog and I t...


April 19, 2023

4/19/2023 in The Beginning

I haven’t been on here in quite a while. Days go on and they go by so quickly before I even have time to do anything with it. I wish I could stop time and not worry about not doing anything. I’m ...


March 20, 2023

March 20 in The Beginning

Just came back from a week in England, already missing it. The memories I made there will forever be with me and a part of me will never be the same as I am desperate to relive the feelings those...


March 09, 2023

Walkin Blues in The Beginning

Sitting down on the bench overlooking the pond listening to some Robert Johnson. Thinking about how fast time passes and how our life is just a small spect on the giant cosmic time-line. Weird to...


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